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mum made me a cup of tea but i’m pissed off at her so i’m not gonna go drink it
that’s how we show our anger in england, you see
sometimes before i pour out a full glass of coke or dr pepper or whatever i’ll fill the glass like a fifth of the way and then stand in my kitchen pretending it’s whiskey or something. then i’ll drink it down in one big gulp and make that grimacey face and pretend i’m thinking of some real deep tortured soul stuff.
oh, the things i do alone in the kitchen could fill a blog.
throwing lamps at people who need to lighten up
throwing handles at people who need to get a grip
throwing refrigerators at people who need to chill
throwing scissors at people who need to “cut it out”
throwing clocks at people who need to get with the times
throwing matches at people who need to get fired up
Throwing a brick at someone to kill them
gUYS THERE IS THIS RUNNER IN THE OLYMPICS AND HIS LAST NAME IS GAY I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING HE’S RUNNING AROUDN WITH A SIGN THAT SAYS GAY